Category Archives: The Wii

Don’t hate me because I’m dieting.

The results are in.  Six months of playing video games, I hit my goal.  Granted the last three were due to illness (what was that phrase in that movie – “I’m just one stomach flu away from my goal weight!”), but I did it.  I hit 195 – for a grand total of right at 35 pounds lost in six months.

It was with pride that I made my way into the Dr’s office for a checkup.  The visit was to get some meds as I was not feeling well, but I figured while I was there I would ask – nay – insist that they do a blood test.  I was of course a Wii Fit evangelist when talking to everyone on staff and explaining the recent loss in weight since the last visit.  The looks of amazement and envy were worth it.  It made it better to tell them how much fun it was. . .

The blood test results came in the other day, and the nurse explained to my wife that it was bad news.  Apparently my HDL (the “GOOD” cholesterol) was actually lower, but the BAD cholesterol had made a huge drop.  So now the ratio was all screwy and that’s not good as it puts me in some percentile risk for some heart disease or something.  Or was it that there was a .4% increased chance I would be struck by lightning?  Can’t remember.

In any case, when my wife asked what could be done to remedy this drastic situation, the nurse responded with those words we all fear.  “He is going to have to change his diet.”

I have to eat foods that will improve HDL.  And thus began the research.

Apparently, I am going to have to force myself to eat more dark chocolate. 


Red Wine is a must.  At least 1 to 2 drinks a day is a good start. 

More flax seed.  More Orange Juice.  More Walnuts.  And I have to start exercising.

My wife calls it… the “are you kidding me !?!” diet.  I call it – “suffering, with style.”

And being the over-achiever that I am with regards to the exercise, I am finding that red wine can certainly improve more than just the HDL.

So basically, more video games, more wine, more chocolate.

Life can be so hard.

Someone called me Normal today, so I wept for joy.

Ok, so I may be exaggerating on the last part of the title.  I didn’t actually weep for joy, but I was very happy about it.  You see, for the past six months I had hoped that I would one day be told that I was normal – as you can probably tell I am not often told that.  Today was the day, which made it extra special – for as I am writing this it is New Year’s eve.  Of course if it actually gets published on New Year’s Eve remains to be seen…

Here’s how it went down.  In 2008, during the 165th hour of fighting the fat by playing video games, I finished a most satisfying round of geometry wars, in which I once again smashed my arch nemesis’s high score (mind you by 20,000 which makes it all the more irritating for him) and moved on to the ‘body test’ portion of the Wii Fit.  Instead of telling me “THAT’S OVERWEIGHT!!!!” like it usually does, my Mii (pictured below) jumped up and down, clapped his hands and gave me the ‘thumbs up’ signal.  Apparently I had obtained normality.

So to get an overall sense of what this actually means I went through the screens that track my progress.  It told me that I had lost weight since the last time, and that I was approaching my goal at a good pace!  I was so happy. . .but then the Wii slapped me back to reality – and that my normality could be fleeting.

Yeah, so what does that mean?

Um, did you seriously just tell me that?

I elected to end the body test here before it got any worse – but here are the results… and I am very happy so far.  From 231 down to 202 in 6 months.   29 pounds, 165 hours.   Gotta love video games.

Ah.  It feels good to be normal, again.

Techno Wii

Ok – so here is the latest craze when working out with the Wii Fit. (Yes, I am still at it…)

Geometry Wars 2.

It has all the exercise benefit of a techno rave without the dangerous side effects of illicit drugs, permanent scarring from the sight of scary looking things “dancing”, and the horror of witnessing grown men and women chomping on pacifiers.   (Don’t ask me how I know these things.  It’s a long story that I have only shared with my wife and will not repeat again without serious counseling and/or imbibing.)

But I digress.  I think my average was 3500 steps in 30 minutes before I started playing this game.  Thanks to the techno beat and frenetic pace of the game I think I will exceed 14000 steps soon (Just kidding, though I did hit 3775 recently).  Mind you I am a bit concerned about the smoke coming from the yoga mats below the Wii board.  To top it off, my online nemesis got upset when I beat all of his high scores recently, so he played until his fingers fell off and hit some pretty high scores himself.  The gauntlet has been thrown down.

Thanks to “xboxic” for the pic…

Quote of the day

“I’m so glad you didn’t exercise this morning.  It’s nice that I didn’t have to share you with the other Wii-man.”

I will let you guess who.

From 231 to 205.6 (this morning in fact).  I think the wife is secretly pleased I am seeing the Wii.  135 hours of video games in all of their flab reducing, omentum shrinking, belt tightening (3 notches) goodness.  And here comes the holiday season. . .

Where are Wii going?

Sleep deprivation seems to get more difficult as I get older.

So I had to go to a conference, and how sad is this – I put two towels over a phone book and did the Wii fit step routine for 45 minutes one night.   After the conference, I came home, dreading what I knew was coming.  I turned on the TV, plugged it all up, braced for impact, and was met with my ‘snarky’ welcome home message.

I didn’t dare breathe a word about the phone book.  The Wii seems to have gotten over it pretty quickly because the next frame it was complaining about Aunt Jen again…  (Thanks Aunt Jen!)

In the meantime, the birthday rolled around (remind me to post the Wii comments on that one later).

Thanks to a wide variety of contributions, I made a purchase that encourages healthy habits, assists me with weight loss, and improves my metabolism.  Yes, you guessed it, Call of Duty: World at War.

Lately my faithful companion – the large carpet we affectionately call a cat – has been at my feet while I have been Wii fitting and making my way through each Pacific Island of the campaign.   Last night he was asleep but dreaming up a storm and making odd noises whilst he slept.  I could only wonder what he was dreaming. . .

The Aperture Science Weight Loss Labratory is Now Open.

So my good friend who shall remain nameless to protect the guilty reminded me yesterday of how much fun the game Portal is on the Xbox 360. (click link for a great description on how it works..)   I had played it a while back and marked it as one of the best games around with the best ending I have ever seen to a game.

Last night I picked it back up and realized that while I had finished the game, I had never gone back to try it again – and to my surprise found some ‘unlocked’ levels…. !!!  How fun is that?

So while exercising on the Wii Fit, I was reminded by the Aperture Science Laboratory on my Xbox that at the end of the experiment:

  • There would be cake.
  • I would be missed.
  • I could donate one or more organs to the Aperture Science Laboratory’s Self Esteem Program for girls.

I have a feeling the weight may come off a lot faster, but I am concerned about the cake.

Wii-sistance is futile.

At first, I thought it was cool.  It likes mii.  It’s actually impressed with mii.

But then, something strange happened.

I tried to explain, but….

Now, I am concerned.

If you see Aunt Jen, please tell her to report in.  She’s in the picture below – the one on the far right – sleeping…